It’s been a rough week.
A really rough week.
Beyond a sudden fever coming out of nowhere, I’ve been a bit down for a few random, but all related reasons. Namely, I’ve lost a few things which shouldn’t have been lost and, while on a whole they are unimportant, it’s still something which acts as a depression trigger. Combine that it’s been nearly a year since people’s bullshittery forced me to have move most of my life into storage, and I quite miss my collection of strange objects, old computers, games, typewriters, phones, and all the other junk I own.
I’m still working on getting more comfortable with being open about things here, and evolving this website and the grander project that it is from a media – entertainment project back into me sharing my slice of the human experience. Soon that will include at least going over what the past year has encompassed but it suffices to say people suck.
To try to make myself feel better I’ve marathon watched some classic AVGN, fired up Mega Man Maker for the first time in like 10 months, and took care of my plants. Yeah, I’ve gotten into houseplants since I no longer have a yard to attend to, and that’s helped with depressive spikes (I’m so sick of rental brown on every wall in my life it isn’t even funny) but, well, that’s the most I can do till things come together.
I don’t mean to be down, or a bummer in this — I’m just being honest. I’m always honest, and genuine, with what I think and how I feel. It’s just now I’m working towards sharing more about me, in the one place online I feel I should be comfortable doing such, a place that’s mine and is under my complete control.
Last night I recorded about 25 minutes of audio talking about what’s been on my mind, intending to release it. I didn’t, and likely won’t. This happens often, I’ll think it may be good to express myself in such a way, and I record the content but decide to hold off. I guess it’s a therapeutic act in the same way I hope writing about these things here will become. Maybe. Hopefully.
For now it’s just work work work. The Wolf River Phone project is stable, of course, as is Final Zone BBS. I just need to make time to write more, both major and minor entries. That, and redo many of the pages and the navigation around this place.
I’ve considered moving to Substack, but I didn’t like the idea of losing that “I can do what I want with this place” nature that WordPress, as annoying as it has become, allows me. Maybe I could get people to subscribe there, but let’s be honest — it likely wouldn’t happen, and I’d rather just go with the flow as it is here. Why ruin a good thing?
I’m hoping to make this a good, productive week. We;ll see by Friday how that turned out, but I’ve got some ideas brewing for some fresh content, and finally bringing back some old projects I’ve certainly missed.
More to come, as always.