Lunar New Year is upon us once again, which means it’s time for me to, in a very symbolic way, tie my current state in life to the animal which represents this current lunar cycle in many East Asian mythologies.
In this case, we have begun the year of the horse. This is, honestly, a painful analogy to me. One who I cared greatly for who has been the root cause of the past nearly 4 years of pain in my life very much loved horses, and so, with my nature of building deep connections, it is impossible to see or think of the creatures and not be reminded of that person.
Perhaps, while I’ve been dealing with the inner demons for years, this coincidence on this year, at this time, represents upcoming progress — perhaps the end of a cycle and a return to normalcy I felt when a representative of the spirit of the horse was last in my life? Maybe. Hopefully. Not in a case of that human being involved again — fuck that — but finally a return to normalcy.
I normally can relate tot he animals themselves in these entries each year, but truly in this case I cannot relate to the horse in any meaningful way. The creature truly has no unique traits that I can connect with that are not shared by another animal that I do feel I can relate to as I have in previous years entries here.
Maybe that too is for the best. Maybe it represents freedom; an emptiness not of absence but of pure potential, like a wild horse on the plains being able to realistically go whatever direction it wants.
This is all symbolic, of course. I don’t take these concepts seriously but use them as a chance to focus on my own life, as it has been, and as it may be, for what value my subconscious can pull from that.
More to come, as always.
